Okay, I do not profess to being the sexiest man alive, and my definition of sexy may be different to yours. I think everyone has a different kind of sexy they can settle into. I know my own success came when I managed some real confidence, and this real confidence came from wanting to be myself, not from wanting to attain some cliché image of sexiness. I do think there are some tips that can help, so here are 8 ways to become incredibly sexy:
1. Be Comfortable With Who You Are
Don’t try to speak like Sean Connery, or flex like Peter Andre. Don’t even try to be as flawlessly groomed as Leonardo Di Caprio. As you might be able to tell I do not watch a lot of television, and my examples are running short. My point is that sexiness never involves trying to be somebody else; it involves trying to be an expressive you. One that is not oozing insecure, or nervousness. You should only aim to be happy with who you are as a person, and express interesting aspects of yourself. There is NO objective sexy, and don’t let any beauty magazine, skin care adverts, or Hollywood movie clichés tell you any different.
Intelligence can be sexy, so can docility, shyness can be, so can stubbornness, extroversion, introversion, being a clown, being a plumber. As long as self assurance is in place then you are already sexy in yourself. Be yourself! This is the number one tip on sexiness.
2. Be Comfortable In Your Skin
It is a part of being comfortable with who you are, and where sexiness is concerned, it is a big part at that. We must be able to embrace our body type, skin color, and our own private parts. Spend time looking in the mirror in admiration of your own flesh. Dance, or enjoy exercise; this roots you firmly in the body, and improves bodily esteem. When we feel good about our bodies, no matter what their “type,” we give off radiance, attractive radiance that other people can perceive. We hold our posture differently too.
3. Don’t Always Chase
If the first two tips were helpful in order to become more sexually present, the remaining tips will help with an approach to sexiness when we are out and about attracting a mate. The first mistake to make is to chase hard, fast, and often. There is nothing sexy about taking every possible opportunity to go deliberately looking for some sexual encounters. Sure it can be fun every now and then, but if it starts to define you as a person then it is hideously unattractive. Being seen having fun with friends, or standing alone with self assurance, is much more attractive than hanging around like a fly.
4. No Sleaze!
One step further than chasing, is being a sleaze. This is very, very bad for sexiness. It is the act of hounding potential mates, drooling over them and coming on too strong. When people are out having a good time they may not be looking for your sexy input! They may just want to dance and chat to their friends. Nothing wrong with that, and it is no ones place to ruin this noble intention. So be subtle, and take a hint when people want to be left alone.
5. Aim To Enjoy
If you start a conversation or a dance with the intention of trying to “pull” or “get laid,” or “find a mate” in layman’s terms, then the action has what is known as an ulterior motive behind it. That is, you are effectively trying to initiate an interesting interaction with a person, only to eventually meet your own gain.
Here is a better idea, and one that I have recommended to many friends in the past; talk to as many people as possible; for fun, to learn, to have a good time. Chat to men and women, and forget about being sexy or trying to find a mate. If and when you click well with someone, the moment will become obvious, and a spark will be born through genuine connection. Sexy is natural. Aim to have fun, nothing else. This will make interactions genuine and natural. Sexiness is about connection more than anything.
6. Make Good Eye Contact
Nothing is more powerful and more sexually alluring than eye contact. Don’t be too strong and forceful, but enjoy gazing softly into the eyes of another person as you speak to them. Again it helps if you are aiming only to enjoy an interaction, and it helps if you can be comfortable in yourself. Good eye contact is very sexy, and human beings love it.
7. Feel Good And Smile
Think about the people who you find sexy, and what features you really like about them. The macho among you will likely jump up and shout “breast,” and “bum,” but underneath your hard shells you know the truth. It is the eye contact and the smile that does it; the little curl of the lip, the concealed joy breaking through onto the surface of the face. Smile and feel good, and sexiness will follow.
8. Be Approachable But Somewhat Mysterious
There is no art to being approachable. It is another one of those things you must be genuine about. Be open to the people around you; smile and make eye contact, be receptive to the smiles and eye contact of others, be ready for interactions, conversations and laughter. Feel approachable, give off the genuine feeling of wanting to be approached, and people will be attracted to you.
Don’t give all of who you are away at once though, and do not express everything too strongly. This is perhaps the first sexy “tactic” so far but it helps. Do not lie or withhold information when asked, but do not hit people with your most interesting feats in the first 10 minutes; let them find out themselves that you have traveled the world; let it open up in genuine conversation later on, instead of boasting about it to them now.
