What does it mean to feel worthy and empowered? I used to think it was related to the approval that I gained from other people, and the amount of control I could exercise over my life. Now I tend to think more about being self-empowered, and about feeling a sense of self-worth. Power and worth are not allocated to us by other people, or decided by society. Real power and real worth begin the second we begin to feel them from within ourselves.
Power Is Not Given By Others
We need to stop looking to other people for our worth, stop looking to others to give us more power, and stop thinking that we will only be powerful when we have money, control, and sit high at the top of a career ladder of some sort. Power and status are unrelated. Real power comes from within. This is contrary to popular belief, and the image that we are fed of what it means to be worth something. We often hear the media describe a humble cleaner as a “nobody,” and a drug addicted immoral Wall Street Wolf as some sort of glorified ideal of what it means to be powerful.
This image seeps down right into our psyche, and starts to pollute the purity of real power and worth. We can feel implied pressure from the people we know, and from society in general aswell. We think we are not worthy if we do not have a highly valued role in a corporate setting, if we wear scruffy clothes, if we do not talk or walk or act a certain way. The people we know might also hold some sort of ideal that they would like us to conform to, and we might feel a lack of worth when faced with their imposing image.
If we seek a false sort of power, the sort that seeks to control people, places, and all aspects of life, then we will inevitably lose our sense of self worth, because we face dissonance in our day-to-day life, and we feel power only if we exercise control. Alas, in order to gain self-worth and self-power we must learn how to feel it from inside of us.
Real Power And Self-Worth Are Born Within
So, the first stage to gaining our own self worth is to step away from the notion that we should seek it from other people, or that we can only be powerful and worthy if we conform to a preconceived image of what that means. We will feel worth for ourselves when we can be true to ourselves, and this often means going against the grain of what other’s expect. When we start to make decisions for ourselves, whether or not they fit the given image, we take real power for the first time.
Real power is internal because it involves inner strength. External power only seeks to dominate through forceful action, or through cunning manipulation. Real power is having the strength within to hold your own values in high esteem, and to hold traits that can never be taken away from you; dignity, self respect, compassion, generosity, optimism, and the power to love and be loved. These are the truly powerful traits. Irrespective of age, gender, race, financial status, or any other factor we can all cultivate these nobel, powerful, and worthy traits.
Self power and self worth can therefore never be given to us, nor can they ever be taken away; they are truly internal.
How To Improve Self Worth And Self Power
- Stop looking to others for approval and power. Think about what you value about yourself.
- Cultivate positive traits in order to become an empowered individual.
- Don’t seek to control other people; this is not power.
- Power and worth are not physical traits; you cannot buy them, or progress through a job to earn them. Sucking up to your boss does not make you powerful.
- Know your worth through your positive actions, and the positive effects you have on the people around you.
- Have control over your life, but be prepared to relinquish it in order to really show courage and compassion.
- If you do not feel valued in the workplace, make your concerns known, and be willing to seek an environment that shares your sense of worth.
- Know the inherent value of yourself.
- Know the inherent value of the work you do; if you know you are skilled then nobody else’s opinion matters.
- Have love for yourself and others. This will empower you more than anything else.